Ok so the first step on my pursuit of becoming president was to join my homeowners association. Well My cousin is the president and she had been asking me to come out because she needed help, I finally agreed. So first off I had my daughter with me it was at 7pm and daycare had been closed and her mom didn't seem to care that I was doing something so me and my sidekick hit up the local church (where the meeting was being held). I walked in and 2 people were waiting for me. I said hi and introduced myself. No sign of my cousin. We waited like 10 min and then 2 more people showed up. So we went back to this room. Why the hell was it the church classroom? Full of toys! My daughter ran off to play with the kitchen, all I could do was lower and shake my head. It was going to be a long meeting.
As soon as I sit down this guy looks me dead in the face and asks "are you a homeowner?" I replied "umm Yeah for about 5 years now, you ignorant bastard!" ok that last part was in my head but who the hell was he to ask me? I was at a HOMEOWNERS meeting. Why else would I be wasting my thursday night? Turns out he is the Vice President. And maybe I shouldn't have been there in full drug dealer gear (white tee, jeans and jordans) but I did have my daughter with me, so that should have told him something. So was already upset with him. he didn't ask anyone else just me. N E Way my cousin finally shows and there are 7 people there total, this includes the officers so in reality there are 2 regular homeowners. Me and this other lady who suffered some flood damage from all the rain we received. I don't know where all my neighbors were but apparently this small ass group decides how to spend out homeowners money. Did I mention my daughter has taken her shoes off and is playing dress up with some random shoes she found in a dress up bin? yeah she is being quiet but I keep giving her dirty looks to keep her in check. Overall she behaved, I was proud of her.
So the meeting is going on, they are talking about crime in the area (can you believe kids in the burbs are spray painting stuff?) They mention some other stuff and the meeting is over. I chat with my cuz for a second and she tells me if I join the architecture committee I don't have to pay my dues. I'm all for not paying stuff so I agree. Basically I have to snitch on my neighbors about how they messing up they house. that's easy enough. And I'm in charge of some spreadsheet, to save that $70 a month I'm all in.
Step one of my campaign is complete, now all I have to do is move up the ranks and become VP. I can't overtake my family, I'm too nice for that.
On another note I was telling my niece about running for president and she told her mom about it. Do you know what my dear sister said? of course you don't but she said "You need a degree to be a Senator". Damn haters.. lol I think she still bitter that I got a higher SAT score than her without studying. She was the smart sibling till that, I'm lazy not dumb... lol she might be right but she didn't have to say anything. Now I have to go back to school and finish my bachelors degree. This may be a long campaign.
Can I take a minute to say how much I love my Niece? She's 14 and wants to be a Broadway actress. What kid has dreams like that? I'm amazed she is related to me. This lead to a discussion about me bringing my secret service detail to her shows. She doesn't even call me Uncle Dave, she just calls me Davey. I'm not even mad about it that's my homie. She give me hope for the future, she not all on boys dicks, she dresses her age, she appreciates stuff. She is everything I expect a teenage girl to be. Hopefully she will not lose her mind in high school.