12 August 2008

Bring it back Tuesdays.... pt 3

Awww welcome back to bring it back Tuesdays. Today we take a look at a relationship post I did way back on Jan 03, 2007.....


As the holiday season draws to a close I'm reminded of something my uncle Curt told me years ago. Never get a new girl in the winter. I mean Never, just too much going on for a new relationship to survive. think about it, you have Thanksgiving, where she just might meet the family. Once she meets the family they will forever ask about her, you don't need that for some girl who might not last a month. Then you have to get her something for Christmas, which is a disaster because something too nice and your committed to buying nice things forever, something too cheap and she thinks you really don't care and she is just some jumpoff. Plus she may see the family again so they will really ask about her all the time. It's a no win. Then you have to take her out for new years, that's more money on a girl you may or may not think will last till the spring. THEN you have Valentines Day!!! which is a all girl day, dudes get squat for V-day. So you have to do something romantic for that. So in 1 season you have a years worth of relationship stuff, that's just not a good thing. Better to wait till the spring and give it all spring, summer and fall to get to know her before having to go thru all that. My uncle is a wise man, I can only hope to teach the youth as well as he taught me.

update: I've been thinking about this for an hour or so and even though I love my uncle he is divorced and lives alone. Maybe he is not the best person to get relationship advice from. So on that note forget every thing I said above... LOL


looking back on this I still believe this to be true.(the update was apart of my original post) My uncle might not be a love guru but this little bit of advice was pure gold to me. Yeah he divorced and lives alone but he wants it that way. You can't deny someone's wisdom based on a choice they made. That doesn't mean they have not been thru it before, they just choose a different route.

14 comments:

Opinionated Diva said...

Hmmmm...interesting way to look at it, but not really.

Thanksgiving is actually in the Fall and Christmas is only a few days after Winter even starts, sooooooooo odds are most women you meet are not going to expect a gift, to meet your parents for the holidays, or to spend New Years with someone they've only known for days. You might be on the line for V-day though...and would that really be that bad if you actually met someone you like?

It all just seems silly.

I'm not trying to deny your uncle's wisdom...but...well...I guess I am! lol

Super Dave Van Buren said...

damn you and your "logic"... lol If she don't want to meet the family or hang out during the holidays then all bets are off.

Ieisha said...

Almost two years later and you still stand behind that? We are all grown folks up in here. Yeah, a 17 year old might expect a Christmas gift from you but I'd think any REAL woman who met you in October wouldn't expect a gift for Christmas.

And if you get unlucky enough to catch a chic who has her hand out expecting something, tell her about the concept of expectation. She can expect it all she wants, doesn't mean she gets a damn thang.

Folks should stop doing stuff expecting sh!t in return. That's the problem.

And let me tell you, the parents asking about the date is the worst. I hardly EVER take a guy to meet the family. My mom was just saying the other day that she didn't meet many guys I dated. Trust, it was for a reason. Dude has gotta be worthy.

CocaColaCutie said...

this defies the winter bun phenomenon...

Opinionated Diva said...

lol @ damn you and your "logic"...well at least you realize I'm being logical

so wait...you "want" her to want to meet the family and hang out???

I'm confused

Super Dave Van Buren said...

It's not that I "want" her too, I just don't mind. My family cool if you want to meet them I don't have a problem with it. It's all the questions they will have afterwards I have a problem with.

sweetkeikei said...

lol this is some good stuff

Ms. Behaving said...

Damn...you make it sound like having a woman is soooo much work!! LOL

Ms. Lovely said...

idk if I necessarily agree with all that tippin and toeing around holidays. If that's the case you shouldn't get a b/f or g/f in the summer since it's hunting season and you're liable to cheat or be cheated on with all the flesh and pheromones running wild..

but def agree with Ieisha

I will never bring another man around some of my family or talk about anyone i'm dating for that matter..

RealHustla said...

Your uncle just probably has everyone thinking he wants to be alone so that his solitude doesn't look so heart breaking.

Getting your family involved in relationships can save you a lot of time. Depending upon how genuine they are they can either help you to see through a woman's disguises or help you see good qualities that you may have missed. It's like you get to use everyones experience.

Hmmm, if I start dating someone in October, I'm gonna want a little sumthin' sumthin' for Christmas. I mean how much does some bubble bath and candles cost? They say a whole lot to.

rebecca said...

hey super dave,
I think that its fine to get involved in a relationship during the fall/winter months... I am not expecting gifts If I knew you for a couple of months.. In regards to meeting your family.. Thats serious to me a cousin or whatever is cool but the whole family and its only been a little while since I meet the guy.. it can be overwhelming... When xmas comes around a gift can be optional for both ppl if were together for a short time... You can at least give me a card... and vice versa... and if we make it to valentines day I can give you a card and a little something something... I'm not expecting crazy gifts or diamonds for the holidays... I think the best thing is just to ask your significant other hey what do you want for insert holiday here... i hope this sounds alright I haven't been in a relationship for forever so I may be a little rusty lol

-Q. said...

Hey say what you want.. theres some truth to that. Ironically, my uncle told me almost the same thing bout 7 years ago and I came to the same conclusion BUT!!! There is some truth to that!.

Its a heavy season bro! And you right, if you cant bring the new 'one' to the crib to meet the fam and for the holidays she gotz ta skeet skeet skeet on..

Super Dave, I swear i relate to almost everythang you ever posted.. crazy. Peace -Q.

nikki said...

all i know is that ya uncle chose to freeze his ass off during the winter months while his boys had a soft, warm ass to spoon up against.

heat bills ain't no joke! the high cost of a heat bill from sleeping alone might actually cancel out all positive gain from spending no money on the sista.

and yeah, i would say most sistas aren't expecting to be introduced to the fam. in fact, i know i would RUN from that.

The Dreamy One said...

u and ur uncle are so not right!!!

you betta stop listening to him before you be a lonely old man like him,lol