26 August 2008

Bring it Back Tuesdays... It's not you it's me

I wrote this back July 2, 2007, I re-read it and it's still funny to me....

This blog is brought to you by my buddy Roe Van B, who in between talking his usual shyt came up with the best idea I've heard in a while. First I'll give you some background. Me and Roe were in the chop shop making shirts and talking shit as usual when he said he had firing power at his job. Now Roe is the last bamma you want to give firing power too, he hates everyone at some point in time... lol Anyway we were talking about firing people within 90 days of employment or your probationary period. You know when you first start a job your don't get any kind of benefits or anything for the first 90 days. Just in case things don't work out your new job can fire you with no problem.


Now Roe mentioned how we should have that policy with the girls we mess with, you know if on the 25th day we realize you just might be crazy we can stop all communication with no harm done. No need to provide a real reason, just things are not working out, It's not you it's me... lol. No benefits package, Payment of unused leave, nothing we could just bounce. Not even an over dinner face to face breakup, just do a text message break up. "Hey this is not working for me, see you next lifetime". And that's IT!!!

Now this could apply to everyone, Ladies if you start dating a dude and 2 weeks in you realized that he sleeps with stuffed animals then you should be able to fire him and go about your business. No worrying about him showing up at your job with flowers begging for you back or asking whats wrong. Just a mutual understanding that this is not the job for you and we should go out separate ways.
On this same note we could apply the probation period to everything, no spending the night for 90 days (sorry, you gotta bounce baby), no meeting the friends or family. No gifts, anything you consider a benefit doesn't kick in for 90 days of employment... lol Too many times you meet a girl and think everything is great then just when you start to relax your crazy radar starts going off, this is a way to help getting stuck trying to breakup with some crazy person you have not even known that long.

16 comments:

Opinionated Diva said...

OK...I already do this, so you and Roe need to stop tryna take credit for stuff that's been done since the beginning of time.

Super Dave Van Buren said...

Aww Diva, what would I do without you? I'm saying that everyone should so this, not just a select few of us.

note: orginally this said "Damn you Diva!!!" but I decided I will not damn you anymore, I don't want to earn any new nicknames.

RealHustla said...

Okay, I have to agree with you. These policies would be great. But what you haven't talked about is how to implement them. Do you think you would get a second date if you had an orientation discussing these policies during the first date?

Damn, you got it like that, Dave?

Super Dave Van Buren said...

What you mean hustla? Got what like what? It only takes 1 crazy person for you to start thinking of rules... lol

NikkiJ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
RealHustla said...

Nooooo, I thought you intended to establish the rules from the get go, just in case on the 25th day you realize something ain't right. This is regardless of whether or not the other person seems a little nutso in the beginning or cool at first.

What I meant by "got it like that" is "damn, baby, is you that fly that you can me presenting rules of engagement during the first date?" LOL.

Super Dave Van Buren said...

@hustla - Naw I'm not throwing down rules over drinks... lol that would be funny though, I might do that to some girl I don't like just for the laugh. lmao.. "you have 25 days to impress me or your outta here!!"

Melody.Darlene said...

aaaahahahahah!!! im talking to a guy right now and we've only been talkin for a month. no s3x or none of that yet. and we had this SAME convo! it's a mutual understanding, like u cant meet my fam yet b/c u may not be here tomorrow! lmao!

CocaColaCutie said...

this would be helpful for a situation i'm going through right now

contagiouslyCRANKY said...

Why is it that when women have that rule they always seem to find men that dont agree and wanna get attached by day 17??

Ieisha said...

Only 90 days???? Well, I can't really speak on this, I'm retired, remember?

But I can dig it.

Super Dave Van Buren said...

@Melody - See follow these simple rules and everyone can be happy... instructional dvd for sale in the back.. lol

@Cocacolacutie - DVD's for sale in the back....

@Contagiously - I can't really answer that question but dvd's are for sale in the back... lol No really I would take it as a compliment that dudes want to wife you so soon.

@Ieisha - Only 90? damn girl that's 3 months... that's longer than some marriages.

The Dreamy One said...

yeah i am defintely going to have to use this

thanks for helping us girls out Dave,lol

Ms. Behaving said...

Chick must have been a nutjob for real because it reads like you REALLY put some thought into this. [LOL]

MysTery said...

Lol, yeah. Sounds good to me!

iCandy21 said...

ooo I should have adopted this firing situation plan a long time ago. I'm a sucker for spending money and buying gifts...giving way too many benefits way too early. If I would have had the plan...I would have saved alot of money lol...damn it!