PSA: I have proof read this and honestly I don't think anyone should be offended. It should be common knowledge, plus I was also instructed by my lawyer and the pyt to write it. As usual when talking about women someone is bound to catch a feeling or two. So let me start by saying this is not about anyone in particular and if you think this is about you maybe you just need to do some soul searching and get your shyt together. Thanks for you time now back to the program.
Alot of woman complain about the lack of "quality" black men. I always find this funny because I regularly run into women who wouldn't even date themselves. Everyone has standards and that's perfectly fine, but some people need to get realistic about their situation. It just might be that the "quality" men don't want to date you because you have nothing going for you. For example lets say you met a dude who was 25, unemployed and still lived at home with his moms and had 3 kids by 3 different women. You would be real hesitant to date him, you might even have a couple red flags go up. Especially if you had a job and your own place and no kids. The same goes for dudes, there are some situations you just avoid. We have red flags too. These situations vary from dude to dude. An example being that I'd be wrong to say I don't date women with kids when I have one but when a woman with no kids tells me that they won't date me because I have a kid I can't do anything but respect it. So the situations you avoid greatly depend on what situation your in. When men meet women we think what do they bring to the party? often times the best quality a women bring is simply sex. Women always say "I can do bad all by myself" guess what? so can we. Nothing contributes to a man's downfall quicker than a woman. We all know this so it's just good practice to evaluate the situation before you dive in with some new girl. I don't get women who seem to think that just because they have a nice "personality" and give good head that men should want to wife them up. That's shyt men look for in a jumpoff/side chick not a wife. Alot of thought goes into the wife process and sure good head helps but why would you want a girl who might pull you down? I can't speak for all men but I know I worked damn hard for the lil bit of stuff that I have. Why do I want a girl who might come in and mess it up? Why would a dude take a chance on someone he might have to support? Sure a man is supposed to provide for his family but you have to bring more than looks to the party. Nothing is sexier than a independent woman who is focused and committed to something. Something more than shopping that is. Shyt even Ne-Yo has a song about it and he might be gay. Sure you can say "I was supporting myself before you came along" and that would be true but lets be honest, if you have a boyfriend and run into some trouble you'll expect him to help out. That's just the nature of a serious relationship. Now the odds of a independent woman running into trouble are far less and an unemployed chick. So if your playing the odds you wife the former not the latter. If your a grown woman with kids and you can't even maintain employment than something is wrong. Actually if you choose to be unemployed and live at home with your moms than that's cool. really I don't have a problem with it, just don't talk bad about a dude who is in the same situation as you.
"I'm a movement by myself but I'm a force when we’re together" -Fabolous ft Ne-yo "make me better"
Michelle Obama gave a speech the other night and honestly I saw 5 min of it and turned it off. Not because I wasn't interested I just hate watching speeches. But take a look around blog world and you can see plenty of posts about how inspirational it was and how everyone loves Michelle and Barack's relationship. Here's the thing, their relationship works so well because Michelle can stand on her own. She's not necessarily relying on Barrack to carry her. Hell do a google search on her. She graduated Princeton and Harvard plus she has done just as much to help people as he has. He respects her not because she runs a million dollar company but because she's a strong person. She brings something to the table, they don't need each other but they want each other. They make each other better. They say your wife is a representation of you even when your not around. So as a dude wouldn't you want a woman who can earn respect not based on who you are or what you have done but on who she is and what she has done.