28 June 2011

Spanking

Usually I don’t respond to comments which isn't really fair since ya’ll leave great messages. Like 98% of all the comments are positive, you really are some awesome readers. I even enjoy the 2% who disagree with me, that's just part of life.

That said some anonymous reader commented on my “Canceling Christmas” post and said:

“Keep spanking her. When she grows up she will look for a boyfriend, husband, or man who beats her too.”

Now everyone is entitled to their opinion and I welcome them all, I allow anonymous comments so anyone who wants to comment can. Feel free to continue to comment whether you agree with me or not.

The idea that a father can’t spank his daughter because it teaches her that love only comes from abusive men is ignorant to me. I’ve heard it before and ignored it before. Getting a spanking and growing up in an abusive household are 2 completely different things.

I don’t see the connection with dads using spanking as a disciplinary technique for their daughters and women seeking out abusive men. I’m not talking about abusive dads I’m talking about spanking a child who deserves a spanking. If I was a woman this wouldn’t be an issue. Its ok for moms to spank both sons and daughters. Hell I know some women who literally punch their sons in the chest. To my knowledge getting spanked by your mom never lead a dude to seek out abusive women to date. Hell EVERYONE I know got spanked by their mom. My dad used to spank me with this thick ass leather belt. It didn’t make me want to befriend a bunch of dudes who punked me around. Getting spanked by your parents has nothing to do with seeking abusive relationships.

Lets say it did believe that though and I decided I shouldn’t spank LMS. What exactly am I supposed to do when my daughter deserves a spanking? (note: kids need spankings, I’m positive of this. other punishments are only cool when they know it can be worse. If you don’t spank your kids more power to you.)

Ask her mom to come over and spank her? I don’t want that woman in my neighborhood much less in my house.

Maybe ask my mom? that doesn’t seem fair to have grandma be the hammer, i mean shes grandma a person who is supposed to spoil, not discipline.

Maybe a neighbor? That would be kind of awkward to ask your neighbor to spank your kid because you can’t but they say it takes a village right?

Oh wait I can add it to the list of a potential girlfriend “must be willing to spank my daughter since I can’t” yeah that will work

All these options undermine my authority in the house.

I think growing up in an abusive household is much more likely to make my daughter seek out a abusive relationship then getting an occasional spanking from her dad. I spank her as a last resort, not as a first option. I hug her everyday and tell her that I love her and she is my favorite person. She KNOWS I love her and that I get no joy from spanking her. If she grows up thinking that love is a man beating her then I’ll gladly accept that as my failure.